What's your Intimacy Style?

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Quiz Questions

1.
You're out on a date, and the check comes. You...
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- A.
  Feel awkward and don't say anything. You hate this part of the date and never know what to do!
- B.
  Split it, like usual. You make your own money and don't need anyone to pay for you!
- C.
  Offer to pay for both of you. If you can take care of it, why shouldn't you?
- D.
  Let your date know ahead of time that you'd love for them to treat you. You love receiving!
- E.
  Don't care who pays. You're usually quite tipsy by this point and don't really mind either way.
2.
How do you respond when someone you're dating or in a relationship with says something that upsets you?
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- A.
  You take it on as your fault, and resolve to do better next time.
- B.
  You don't want to be dramatic or make a huge deal about it, so you decide to just let it go.
- C.
  You go out on the town with your girlfriends. You know that after a few drinks and flirting with someone new, you'll feel better!
- D.
  You journal about it, call a friend and ultimately shift your mindset, rather than taking your upset out on the other person.
- E.
  You share honestly and vulnerably about how what they said made you feel.
3.
It's Saturday night, what are you up to?
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- A.
  You're out on the town, getting lit, and having a blast with a group of people you just met.
- B.
  You've been working your butt off all week, so you're ready for a night of relaxing, cozy on the couch, watching Netflix and ordering in your favorite takeout
- C.
  You're hosting a dinner party with live music, amazing food and 20 of your closest friends!
- D.
  You're out with one of your lovers, having an amazing time at a 5-star restaurant.
- E.
  You planned to stay in and do some self-care, but a friend needs you so you end up talking to her on the phone for a few hours.
4.
It's time for sexy time with your lover. You...
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- A.
  keep the lights off because it's easier for you to relax when your lover can't see your body.
- B.
  open a bottle of wine and have a glass or two so you can relax before heading to the bedroom.
- C.
  suggest trying the kinky thing your lover said they're into, even though it's not really your thing.
- D.
  start with foreplay: you give your lover oral, then you switch and they do the same for you.
- E.
  give specific instructions to your lover and then open to receive all the pleasure they can give.
5.
What's your policy on orgasms?
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- A.
  You have a hard time reaching orgasm and struggle when you feel a lot of pressure to have one.
- B.
  You consider sex successful when you and your partner each reach climax.
- C.
  You mostly focus on your partner's pleasure. When they have an orgasm, you feel satisfied.
- D.
  You cum as often as possible! Clitoral, g-spot, and full body orgasms...you love them all.
- E.
  It's easiest for you to climax after you've had a few drinks and you can actually get out of your head.
6.
After an amazing date with someone new, you haven't heard back from them in 24 hours. How do you respond?
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- A.
  You send them a message thanking them for an amazing night and share your desire to hang out again.
- B.
  You wait for them to reach out to you first so you can gauge how interested they are in you.
- C.
  You're already out on a new date and are enjoying connecting with someone new, so you don't mind that you haven't heard back yet.
- D.
  You get really upset and worry that they didn't like you as much as you thought, and call a friend to talk it through.
- E.
  You stalk them on social media and consider blocking them for ignoring you like this.
7.
You're in the middle of having sex and you start to feel dry. You...
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- A.
  let your parter know that you'd like to pause and switch things up, and ask them to go down on you before continuing.
- B.
  don't want to give your partner "blue balls," so you keep going until they finish.
- C.
  start fantasizing about the hottie at your gym and that turns you on again real quick!
- D.
  tell your partner you're complete with the experience and ready to cuddle.
- E.
  feel too uncomfortable, so you don't say anything and just wait for it to be over.
8.
You have a fantasy or an edgy desire. What do you do?
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- A.
  You keep it to yourself. You don't want to freak your partner out or be rejected by them.
- B.
  You offer to act out the fantasy for your partner, even though you secretly wish they would do it for you.
- C.
  You go on the apps and approach a stranger about meeting up for some drinks and then doing the damn thing.
- D.
  You tell your lover exactly what you want, and you let them take the reins on making it happen.
- E.
  You push it out of your mind because you have other priorities right now, telling yourself you'll do it "someday when the stars align"
9.
It's Valentine's Day, and you...
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- A.
  share with your partner exactly how you’d like to celebrate, then get yourself ready for a luxurious night out!
- B.
  write your partner a note, cook their favorite meal, give them a massage, and do everything you can to make the day special for them.
- C.
  don’t want to be too much. Holidays like this make you a bit uncomfortable. But you do secretly hope your partner plans a surprise for you.
- D.
  book a table at a new restaurant you've been wanting to try, and invite the person you're seeing to go with you.
- E.
  get your best friends together to go out and pretend Valentine's Day never existed.
10.
A desire has come up to make a big investment in your personal growth. What do you do?
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- A.
  You deliberate but ultimately decide it's too much and you can't spend that on yourself.
- B.
  Your partner has a big investment coming up, so you decide to support them instead of bringing up your thing.
- C.
  You decide that you don't want to miss out on vacations and parties coming up, so you'd rather spend the money on that.
- D.
  You take on extra clients or work overtime so you can create the funds.
- E.
  You ask someone in your life to contribute to paying for it - you know you're worth it!
11.
What’s the bigger WHY behind your desire for deeper intimacy?
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- A.
  I want more fulfilling connections- to really feel seen and understood by someone.
- B.
  I want a partner to share my life with and start a family with.
- C.
  I want to have fun, explore and get to know different types of people.
- D.
  I want to be able to enjoy (and stop just enduring) sex and fully let go in the bedroom.
- E.
  All of the above!

Quiz Outcomes

1.
You're a Cool Girl
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People LOVE you! You're fun to be around, fit in well, and you know how to make people feel amazing. People are drawn to you and seek you out to connect, collaborate, or just hang out. To the outside world, you look really good and people admire your laid-back attitude and easy-going nature. Your biggest challenge?Being honest about how you feel and getting messy, real and vulnerable.You might wear being "low maintenance" like a badge of honor, which makes it difficult for you to ask for what you really want.You don't text first; you might play games to keep a lover's attention or keep them at arms length. You're an expert at performing in bed to keep the other person happy, but you're often left feeling resentful or empty when your needs aren't met.You have a lot of desire for love, connection and mind-blowing sex, so you don't understand why your relationships feel lacking, nor why you keep dating people who are unavailable or not on your level.However, if you never reveal yourself and your desires, you'll never feel truly SEEN nor create the deep connection you really crave."There are two types of women in the world: those who are high-maintenance, and those who are pretending not to be" - Nicole DaedoneOur top tips for to manifest true intimacy + deeper connection:1. Start to practice asking for what you want, even if it's imperfect and you feel like "too much." You'll be surprised at how much more pleasure you can experience and receive in life - just by being courageous enough to ask!2. Give yourself permission to feel your emotions, and let others see you in your mess. People appreciate your authenticity over manicured perfection.3. Get sisters around you who hold you accountable to telling the truth and expressing vulnerable desires in relationships. It takes a lot to undo the societal programming keeping you stuck, so it's crucial to have women around you who remind you that your vulnerability is your power.Hi👋, we're Aimee and EllieWe're Pleasure & Intimacy Experts and Co-Founders of our company Desire on Fire. Through our retreats and programs, we've taught hundreds of women how to create wild, confident intimacy, orgasmic bliss & fulfilling relationships.We've created a remarkable sisterhood of women who allow their desires and pleasure to lead the way as they step into a whole new world of freedom, manifestation and ease, and we'd love to help YOU to do the same!We invite you to join our Facebook Group, "The Desire on Fire Community" to connect with women across the country and be in a space where you are uplifted and supported in owning your true life!Click the link below to request access to the group!
2.
You're an Independent Woman
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You've worked hard to get to where you are and nothing can get in your way or slow you down.You pay your own bills and you get off on hitting your goals. You're a leader in your life: people look up to you and know you to be inspiring, reliable and efficient. Your big challenge? Your drive for independence might block you from receiving and being able to shift into your feminine energy. When you're always in "hunting mode," you could repel the attention you desire. In the past, you've been accused of being controlling or competitive. Maybe you avoid being vulnerable, because who has time for that?! You prefer to stay focused and keep things positive. You didn't get this far in the world by whining and focusing on the "negative." You'd rather just focus on shifting your mindset than revealing your tender insecurities. You have no problem being friends with men, but you feel embarrassed or fake being flirty or seductive. You're so self-sufficient, it might be hard for anyone to contribute to you. “Being able to let go of a righteous position is a key to creating partnership.”― Alison A. Armstrong, The Queen's CodeOur top tips to manifest true intimacy + deeper connection:1. Next time you’re on a date, practice receiving more. Even though you CAN pay and take care of yourself, doesn't mean you have to (or want to!). You might be surprised by how being in receiving mode helps you feel more connected and in your pleasure. Let your date compliment you, open the door for you, and pick up the bill - without needing to pay them back2. Allow yourself to ask for and accept help, and let people see you without having it all together. Next time someone offers to give you support, let them! If they don't offer, try asking or delegating something you would normally do alone. See how it feels to accept help and not do things so independently.3. Get sisters around you who hold you accountable to expressing vulnerably in relationships. It takes a lot to undo the societal programming keeping you stuck, so it's crucial to have women around you who remind you to allow yourself to be messy, reveal your unfiltered feelings and let people see and support you emotionally, even if it feels painfully uncomfortable.Hi👋, we're Aimee and Ellie!We're Pleasure & Intimacy Experts and Co-Founders of our company Desire on Fire. Through our retreats and programs, we've taught hundreds of women how to create wild, confident intimacy, orgasmic bliss & fulfilling relationships.We've created a remarkable sisterhood of women who allow their desires and pleasure to lead the way as they step into a whole new world of freedom, manifestation and ease, and we'd love to help YOU to do the same!We invite you to join our Facebook Group, "The Desire on Fire Community" to connect with women across the country and be in a space where you are uplifted and supported in owning your true life!Click the link below to request access to the group!
3.
You're a Giver
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You're extremely generous, conscientious, and a great listener.People love being with you because they feel seen, supported and as if your attention is fully on them.You're an expert at making sure everyone is happy and taken care of— your friends know you'd give them the shirt off your back if they needed it.You're a great girlfriend and always make sure your partner is satisfied in bed.Your biggest challenge? Boundaries! You struggle to speak up for your wants and needs, and you fear that if you say “no“ to people or disagree with them, they will leave you or stop loving you.Sometimes you let people walk (and talk!) all over you.You tend to attract people who are controlling or take advantage of your giving nature- which can leave you feeling discouraged about relationships.Or, you might become wrapped up in your partner's drama, meanwhile your body image and self worth suffers because you're not investing time and energy in loving yourself.“Until we can receive with an open heart, we are never really giving with an open heart.”― Brené Brown, The Gifts of ImperfectionOur top tips to manifest true intimacy + deeper connection:1. Work on your relationship with YOU! Take time out of your day that you would normally invest in taking care of friends, coworkers, or family members, and put that attention towards doing something kind and generous for yourself.2. Try saying "no" more often. When you hear your inner voice say "no," practice saying it out loud, even if it's scary! Tell people you need 24 hours to get back to them before you make a commitment. You'll be amazed by how much more connected you feel when you are true to yourself. 3. Get sisters around you who hold you accountable to setting boundaries and honoring yourself. It takes a lot to undo the societal programming keeping you stuck, so it's crucial to have women around you who remind that your no is a sacred as your yes, and you deserve to be taken care of as much as you take care of others.Hi 👋, we're Aimee and EllieWe're Pleasure & Intimacy Experts and Co-Founders of our company Desire on Fire. Through our retreats and programs, we've taught hundreds of women how to create wild, confident intimacy, orgasmic bliss & fulfilling relationships.We've created a remarkable sisterhood of women who allow their desires and pleasure to lead the way as they step into a whole new world of freedom, manifestation and ease, and we'd love to help YOU to do the same!We invite you to join our Facebook Group, "The Desire on Fire Community" to connect with women across the country and be in a space where you are uplifted and supported in owning your true life!Click the link below to request access to the group!
4.
You're a Receiving Queen
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You are a master at knowing what you want, asking for it, and opening to receive it.There’s nothing you love more than being showered in love and attention from someone you respect and admire.You have a lot of experience in relationships- you know what you like (and what you don't like) and you're not afraid to ask for it.You know how to invest in yourself, you value having coaches and guides to teach you what you don't know about relationships so you can thrive. Your lover(s) appreciate your clarity and ability to ask for your desires.Your biggest challenge? Sometimes your high standards makes it a teensy bit hard for your partner(s) to please you. Your high self-worth can at times tip over into entitlement, and past partners have said that they struggled to live up to your expectations. You might be out of balance, receiving too much and not in the flow of giving and receiving Your unwillingess to negotiate with your desires has you be rigid at times, and might create tension if your partner isn't feeling met with the same level of reverence for what they want."A balance of giving and receiving is essential to keeping your energy, mood and motivation at a consistently high level" -Doreen Virtue Our top tips to manifest true intimacy + deeper connection:1. Practice putting attention on your partner or the people you date, and get excited about fulfilling their specific desires as much as they do for you. 2. Pay it forward. When you're receiving a lot, it's important to pour out! Put yourself in a community of women and be a role model for what's possible. Being of service, sharing your turn-on and how far you've come will help you continue to expand (and it just feels good!)3. Find new creative ways to increase your havingness level (how much you'll let yourself receive). Blow your own mind, push your own limits and see just how good life can be!Hi👋, we're Aimee and EllieWe're Pleasure & Intimacy Experts and Co-Founders of our company Desire on Fire. Through our retreats and programs, we've taught hundreds of women how to create wild, confident intimacy, orgasmic bliss & fulfilling relationships.We've created a remarkable sisterhood of women who allow their desires and pleasure to lead the way as they step into a whole new world of freedom, manifestation and ease, and we'd love to help YOU to do the same!We invite you to join our Facebook Group, "The Desire on Fire Community" to connect with women across the country and be in a space where you are uplifted and supported in owning your true life!Click the link below to request access to the group!
5.
You're a Party Girl
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You know how to have a good time, and your friends can rely on you to bring the party wherever you go.You're fun, wild, and DTF. You never have a shortage of guys/people inviting you out or booty-calling you, and your friends love to be entertained hearing about your escapades.Your biggest challenge?You live on the edge, which sometimes causes drama with friends, family, and lovers. You can use substances to numb or avoid uncomfortable conversations, which can keep you from handling situations as your highest self.You might need a drink or two to feel confident in bed, and sometime use sex for attention and validation. Sometimes you can be reckless, and get into situations that aren't for your highest good.Your romantic relationships don't feel quite as grounded as you think they could. Maybe you always have a boyfriend, or you date married men, or you have lots of sex with different partners that sometimes leaves you feeling empty. "There is the life that most of us live, and then there is the life we have buried deep inside us, the life we know we’re supposed to be living." - Holly WhitakerOur top tips to manifest true intimacy + deeper connection:1. Flirt with sobriety. Take a month off from drinking and see how you feel. Practice being real, having vulnerable conversations, and going out without any substances. Notice your discomfort and practice being with it. See if it allows you to be clear and present, and drop in deeper with the people you're connecting with. 3. Get creative on things you want to do that don't include a party. An intimate girls night with friends? Painting class? A camping trip or spa day? Try something new and see how it feels. You might experience a whole new side of yourself you never knew existed.3. Get sisters around you who value intimate conversations and having a healthy, vibrant, fulfilling life. It takes a lot to undo the programming keeping you stuck, so it's crucial to have women around you who remind that you are worthy of thriving relationships with yourself and others.Hi👋, we're Aimee and EllieWe're Pleasure & Intimacy Experts and Co-Founders of our company Desire on Fire. Through our retreats and programs, we've taught hundreds of women how to create wild, confident intimacy, orgasmic bliss & fulfilling relationships.We've created a remarkable sisterhood of women who allow their desires and pleasure to lead the way as they step into a whole new world of freedom, manifestation and ease, and we'd love to help YOU to do the same!We invite you to join our Facebook Group, "The Desire on Fire Community" to connect with women across the country and be in a space where you are uplifted and supported in owning your true life!Click the link below to request access to the group!