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You are a functioning perfectionist!
I have bad news for you: You are definitely a perfectionist.On the outside, you look like a great success. You are doing it all. Balancing a career with your relationships and home life like a champion. You don't complain, you think positively, and you almost never say "no".If you have kids, you are the mom that the other parents look to, shaking their heads and wonder, "How does she do it?"You might bring a beautiful homemade pie to the potluck. You clean every inch of your house before guests arrive. You are an absolute machine at work - you are the first to rush in and fix a problem, or to do extra hours when you are working on an important task. Wait a minute...this doesn't sound so bad... isn't perfection a good thing? Doesn't that mean I strive to be the best and push myself hard towards my goals?Many of us do believe being a perfectionist is a good thing. But I can guarantee being a perfectionist is holding you back from living the joyful, pleasure-filled, vibrant life you truly desire and deserve.I'm willing to bet you are in a bit of denial. Beneath your Stepford veneer, you might be experiencing anxiety, overwhelm, procrastination, and a feeling of "falling short" in life. You might feel like there is never enough time, energy, resources, or chances for you to "do it all".And, although you are productive, once you complete a goal or reach a milestone, you rarely feel a sense of satisfaction or accomplishment. You might struggle with sleep, with a bad relationship with food or substances, or have secret days when you can't leave the couch, exhausted and overwhelmed. You might even have problems with anger.How do I know? This used to be me.My name is Olive von Topp, burlesque performer, empowerment coach & recovering perfectionist. The thing is, perfect doesn’t exist. It’s a fallacy. By trying to be perfect we are always chasing an impossible standard, which means we never feel like enough. This can result in procrastination, low self-esteem, poor boundaries, over-work & exhaustion, feeling stuck, and even depression, to name a few symptoms. Do these sound familiar to you?I'm willing to bet you are self-critical because you think it will motivate you to achieve your goals. The funny thing is, people who are highly self-critical actually have lower self-esteem and higher levels of stress. You know when it’s hard to motivate yourself? When you don’t believe you are a person of value who can do things well!Research shows that people who practice self-compassion have higher self-esteem and are more willing to take risks (which are necessary for achieving goals) because they don't make their failures and mistakes mean something about them personally and they practice self-compassion when they fail.So how do you develop self-compassion & stop being so damn hard on yourself?How do you even know where to start? I can help - read on.