Growing Great Relationships Starts With Understanding....

Quiz Questions

• 1.
  Some people keep anger locked up inside when in conflict, while other people have no problem letting it erupt outwards. When you're in conflict with your partner, are you more likely to ....

  • A.
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    Keep my anger inside and lock it down tightly.
  • B.
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    Better out than in - I let my anger erupt!
• 2.
  The reasoning behind why you keep anger inside is an important distinction when it comes to understanding People Patterns. Are you more likely to keep anger locked up...

  • A.
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    ... to spite them. I'm not going to give them the satisfaction of seeing how I feel.
  • B.
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    ... to avoid angry people. I generally stay clear of anger and angry people.
• 3.
  Some people know full well that shutting down or keeping things inside will infuriate their partners, other people need to shut down out of fear. I pull back from conflict....

  • A.
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    ...even though it will probably annoy my partner.
  • B.
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    ....because I need to get away, preferably to a safer place
• 4.
  Some people are dealing with a tornado of feelings when they're in a conflict, while other people are planning on how to respond. When you're in conflict, are you thinking about how to respond or more distracted by your feelings?

  • A.
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    I am just dealing with my feelings and not really thinking
  • B.
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    I'm definitely thinking about what I'm going to say planning my rebuke
• 5.
  The way we respond to our partners is important, no matter how angry we are. Some of us will be more logical, finding fault in their words. Others will be so enraged we say mean or sarcastic things. There are those that are more in-between.                                              How do you respond to your partner?

  • A.
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    More Emotionally! I aim to make my point. Sometimes I am mean, or I'll roll my eyes and be sarcastic. Anything to make my point.
  • B.
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    More Logically! I'll destroy my partner's argument with facts, evidence and witness reports.
• 6.
  When you're thinking about what to say in response to someone who is upset or angry, are you more likely to take into consideration what they're saying or not?

  • A.
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    Of course! I will point out all their mistakes in their 'alleged' accusations and offer a solid defense to have the entire case dismissed.
  • B.
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    Somewhat, although I tend to give as good as I get, if they're going to point out my flaws, I will certainly take the opportunity to point out theres.

Quiz Outcomes

• 1.
  The Stonewaller

  STONEWALL: The act of refusing communication, stalling, or evading, especially to avoid conflict, and to escape accountability or confrontation. Stonewalling is used sometimes to deliberately frustrate the other party. Over time it reduces intimacy and limits conflict resolution. 85% of Stonewallers are men.Stonewallers might benefit from our free PDF on using 'I' Statements - it's a totally free resource that will help you express what's going on and is almost a guaranteed way to lower conflict in your relationships. Click the image below to get the PDF. Please help spread the word about MyPeoplePatterns - share this on Instagram and tag @MyPeoplePatterns or use #MyPeoplePatterns
• 2.
  The Exploder

  When used correctly, anger generates passion, drive, and energy. When it is misplaced, it can destroy, damage and wound. If you have an explosive temper there could be many reasons why your fuse is so short, but growth for you will be learning to get in touch with your feelings so that you can let off steam before you erupt. Relationships with an Exploder are incredibly tense, with one partner living in fear or anticipation of an eruption. Over time, this strain will block healthy communication and contributes to secrecy, withholding, and emotional distance. If you want to know more about 'THE EXPLODER' and your People Patterns be sure to sign up and get your free PDF on People Patterns In Conflict.Please help spread the word about MyPeoplePatterns - share this on Instagram and tag @MyPeoplePatterns or use #MyPeoplePatterns
• 3.
  The Avoider

  The Avoider lives a self-fulfilling prophecy, by avoiding conflict they increase frustration in their partner. This avoidant behavior either creates new conflict or exacerbates the original issue. In other situations, the Avoider believes their partner won't listen or hear them, so has given up trying to resolve conflict. Most often we find that conflict is avoided because of a FEAR of anger or FEAR of being attacked, in much the same way as we avoid certain work projects or homework, because we FEAR feeling overwhelmed or uncertain. IIf you're an avoider, there's lots of help for you - but the first step is to acknowledge and get in touch with your anxiety around conflict. If you can soothe your fears and concerns, then you're more than halfway there. After that, you just need some skills and tools to help give you a script on what to say and how to say it. If you subscribe to our email list, I will make sure that you get these elements and can begin to feel more confident when it comes to conflict. If you want to know more about 'THE AVOIDER' and your People Patterns be sure to sign up and get your free PDF on People Patterns In Conflict.Please help spread the word about MyPeoplePatterns - share this on Instagram and tag @MyPeoplePatterns or use #MyPeoplePatterns
• 4.
  The Retaliator

  The Retaliator plays a defensive game, by positioning themselves as the victim when under attack or by responding with an attack of their own. Even in stable or happy relationships, when conflict starts off with hostility, there is often a defensive or retaliatory cycle that begins, however, the Retaliator makes this a habit and a pattern that contributes to relationship distress. The video above has more information on the Retaliator and if you want to know more about 'THE RETALIATOR' and your People Patterns be sure to sign up and get your free PDF on People Patterns In Conflict.Please help spread the word about MyPeoplePatterns - share this on Instagram and tag @MyPeoplePatterns or use #MyPeoplePatterns
• 5.
  The Criticizer

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  Criticism can have devastating effects on a relationship, as over time it makes the other partner feel rejected, hurt, and devalued. It often causes a cycle of conflict with hurt feelings in both parties increasing each time, resulting in more frequent conflicts and increasing emotional distance.If you want to know more about 'THE CRITICIZER' and your People Patterns be sure to sign up and get your free PDF on People Patterns In Conflict.Please help spread the word about MyPeoplePatterns - share this on Instagram and tag @MyPeoplePatterns or use #MyPeoplePatterns
• 6.
  The Disdainer

  Disdain is a form of contempt, a judgment or attack on someone's personality or character, from a position of superiority, with an intent to hurt or abuse. As a result, contempt from the Disdainer is utterly poisonous to a relationship. If you want to know more about 'THE DISDAINER' and your People Patterns be sure to sign up and get your free PDF on People Patterns In Conflict.\Please help spread the word about MyPeoplePatterns - share this on Instagram and tag @MyPeoplePatterns or use #MyPeoplePatterns