There are 4 levels of intimacy. What is the level of intimacy in your marriage?

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Quiz Questions

1.
When you think about your future...
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- A.
  It's foggy. You're just going to take it one day at a time.
- B.
  You can see you and your spouse enjoying a long and rich life together, hand in hand with joyful smiles on your faces.
- C.
  You think of spending more time with your children and friends and maybe your spouse will tag along sometimes.
- D.
  You will have so much time to figure out who you really are and who you have always wanted to be. Finally enjoying some freedom to just be yourself.
2.
When you look at your spouse...
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- A.
  You wonder if you made the wrong choice and maybe you would have been happier with someone else.
- B.
  You hear Marvin Gay singing 'Let's Get it On' blasting in your head.
- C.
  You see your best friend, confidant and adventure partner.
- D.
  You hear the song You've lost that lovin' feeling playing in the background.
3.
When your spouse wants to talk to you about something that has been bothering them, how do you react?
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- A.
  I roll my eyes and think...here we go again with all the emotions.
- B.
  I hear them out, let them know that I love them no matter what, and ask them questions to further understand their experience.
- C.
  I ask them to give me a second, run to the bathroom to gather myself, then return and listen to whatever they have to say.
- D.
  I feel my anxiety levels rise, take a few deep breaths, and do my best to listen.
4.
How would you describe the sex in your relationship?
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- A.
  Non-existent. I don't even know what it would feel like to be intimate with my spouse anymore.
- B.
  Electric! We have frequent sessions where we take turns making each other feel amazing.
- C.
  I'm getting my needs met, but it feels forced. Duty sex is real and I feel like my spouse would rather be watching their favorite show than spending time in bed with me.
- D.
  It could definitely be better. We have fallen into a predictable routine and most of the time it's pretty bland.
5.
Can you trust your spouse with your secrets?
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- A.
  Honestly, I would never share the nitty-gritty of my life with my spouse. They don't really care.
- B.
  Heck yeah! If I've got a secret, I can trust my spouse to listen and not tell anyone.
- C.
  Uhm, I'd be better off sharing my secrets to someone with tighter lips...
- D.
  I'm afraid to share too much, because they might use it for blackmail later.
6.
You and your significant other are in a heated argument, how do you repair the disharmony?
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- A.
  I tell them I can't take their drama, then I grab my jacket and hit the road. Maybe time apart will help us cool off.
- B.
  I apologize for hurting their feelings, calmly explain my perspective, then we work together towards a resolution.
- C.
  I beg them not to hate me – seriously, I'll do whatever it takes! I can't handle the thought of losing them.
- D.
  I throw things at them then immediately start apologizing and telling them how much I love them.
7.
How often do you connect with your spouse?
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- A.
  I'm not even sure what connection feels like anymore. They have their jobs and I have mine. We talk about the really important stuff.
- B.
  Daily for at least 20 minutes, because that's what I learned from listening to Secrets of Happily Ever After.
- C.
  We are so busy with work, hobbies and the kids. Probably once a week.
- D.
  We are together 24/7, but we rarely talk about anything besides the task at hand.
8.
What do you and your spouse like to do together?
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- A.
  Nothing! We have nothing in common anymore.
- B.
  Everything! We're always together and we love it.
- C.
  We are always trying new things together. It's more about sharing experiences than the actual activity we are doing.
- D.
  We have a few shared interests, but honestly we usually end up watching a show and going to bed.
9.
How often do you go on dates with your spouse?
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- A.
  We don't have the time or the money for that right now.
- B.
  Once a week, just like you shout from the rooftops.
- C.
  Once a month, but at least it's consistant.
- D.
  I'd rather stay home and watch sports or an episode of Home Edits.
10.
When my spouse starts asking interesting and thought-provoking questions...
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- A.
  I bolt. A barage of questions is not my idea of a good time and my spouse doesn't listen very well anyway.
- B.
  I love it! We always have enjoyable and riviting conversations where we learn so many new things about each other.
- C.
  I don't mind answering their questions, but when it's my spouse's turn to answer, I get short one-word answers.
- D.
  It's fun for a little while, but then one of us loses interest and we end up in a fight about how we never do anything fun together anymore.

Quiz Outcomes

1.
Your intimacy level is... Level 1 - The Whole Package
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Congrats, friend – by completing the "What's your intimacy level?" quiz, you've shown your commitment to building healthy, happy relationships 🙌Based on your responses, your intimacy level is a 1. So what does that actually mean? You're living a fairy tale. While you are married to your best friend, you are also passionate lovers as well.You are confident in yourself and in your marriage. You don't worry about being too vulnerable or losing yourself in your partner's personality. But lest you go thinking that you've made it, know that there is always room for improvement. With a little help, you can learn to listen, communicate, and create even stronger connections."The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in." — Morrie Schwartz3 tips for building and keeping healthy, intimate relationships...1) Don't be afraid to disagreeJust because you are intimate with someone, doesn't mean you have to agree on everything. Instead of bottling up your anger, it's always healthier to talk it out. On top of that, by expressing your emotions, you are developing trust and closeness that is required for developing a truly intimate friendship.2) Keep up with your own interestsEspecially when you have been married for a long time, it can be tempting to take up your partner's interests and, in the process, lose your own. This might end up putting an unhealthy amount of pressure on the relationship. Plus, keeping up with your own interests and friend groups will enrich and add versatility to your time together.3) Practice Open CommunicationInstead of counting on your significant other's mind-reading capabilities, try telling them directly what you want and need. While this might feel a bit awkward at first, practice makes perfect. On top of that, communicating your expectations will encourage your partner to do the same.Want to be friends? Let me introduce myselfHey there, and welcome – I'm Monica Tanner 👋 I'm an expert marriage and intimacy coach based in Boise, Idaho. I'm here to help you and your spouse increase intimacy and connection in your marriage, ditch resentment and get busy writing your happily ever after love story.Studies show that half of all marriages end in divorce and of those couples who stay together, few are actually happy together. On top of that, couples who are unhappy typically wait 6 years before seeking help. That's crazy!!I've made it my goal to create resources to find better ways to communicate and enjoy inimacy, ultimately resulting in an intimate friendship that makes life better then you could even imagine. If you are ready to really start living that fairy tale, keep reading.Looking for a little extra guidance? Check out these 3 FREE resources1) Listen to this episode of my Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast. I share a simple, game-changing hack that will instantly increase intimacy and connection in your marriage. I'll teach you how to override your brain's default thoughts at 3 critical times during the day in order to feel more love and appreciation for your spouse, your family and your home.2) Follow me on Instagram. I post my tips for building healthy, happy relationships. Want more connection, communication, and intimacy? I've got you covered 🙌3)Book a FREE 30-minute consultation with me. If you can't wait another day to start transforming your relationship, book a time for us to chat! You've got nothing to lose, my friend.P.S. Expect to see me in your inbox ASAP with more tips for increasing connection, communication and intimacy!
2.
Your intimacy level is.... Level 2 - Hot and Heavy
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Congrats, friend – by completing the "What's your intimacy level?" quiz, you've shown your commitment to building a healthy, happy and intimate relationship 🙌Based on your responses, your intimacy level is 2. So what does that actually mean? You and your honey are good at the physical/sexual stuff. You like to be in close proximity to one another, but when it comes to the emotional stuff, you are still miles apart.You may struggle to trust your partner with your most personal thoughts and feelings. While getting it on seems super intimate, it's possible to have a physical relationship without actually opening your heart to each other.No matter what your reasons for holding back the deepest parts of yourself, with a little help, you can learn to listen, communicate, and create your best emotionally intimate connection yet."The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in." — Morrie Schwartz3 tips for building and keeping a healthy and intimate relationship...1) Don't be afraid to disagreeJust because you are intimate with someone, doesn't mean you have to agree on everything. Instead of bottling up your anger, it's always healthier to talk it out. On top of that, by expressing your emotions, you are developing trust and closeness that is required for a truly intimate friendship.2) Keep up with your own interestsEspecially when you have been together for a long time, it can be tempting to take up your partner's interests and, in the process, lose your own. This might end up putting an unhealthy amount of pressure on the relationship. Plus, keeping up with your own interests and friend groups will enrich and add versatility to your time together.3) Practice Open CommunicationInstead of counting on your significant other's mind-reading capabilities, try telling them directly what you want and need. While this might feel a bit awkward at first, practice makes perfect. On top of that, communicating your expectations will encourage your partner to do the same.Want to be friends? Let me introduce myselfHey there, and welcome – I'm Monica Tanner 👋 I'm an expert marriage and intimacy coach based in Boise, Idaho. I'm here to help you and your spouse increase intimacy and connection in your marriage, ditch resentment and get busy writing your happily ever after love story.Studies show that half of all marriages end in divorce and of those couples who stay together, few are actually happy together. On top of that, couples who are unhappy typically wait 6 years before seeking help. That's crazy!!I've made it my goal to create resources to find better ways to communicate and enjoy inimacy, ultimately resulting in an intimate friendship that makes life better then you could even imagine. If you are ready to really start living that fairy tale, keep reading.Looking for a little extra guidance? Check out these 3 FREE resources1) Listen to this episode of my Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast. I share a simple, game-changing hack that will instantly increase intimacy and connection in your marriage. I'll teach you how to override your brain's default thoughts at 3 critical times during the day in order to feel more love and appreciation for your spouse, your family and your home.2) Follow me on Instagram. I post my tips for building healthy, happy relationships. Want more connection, communication, and intimacy? I've got you covered 🙌3)Book a FREE 30-minute consultation with me. If you can't wait another day to start transforming your relationship, book a time for us to chat! You've got nothing to lose, my friend.P.S. Expect to see me in your inbox ASAP with more tips for increasing connection, communication and intimacy!
3.
Your intimacy level is... Level 3 - Emotional Besties
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Congrats, friend – by completing the "What's your intimacy level?" quiz, you've shown your commitment to building a healthy, happy and intimate relationship 🙌Based on your responses, your intimacy level is 3. So what does that actually mean? You're good at the emotional stuff, but you could use some help in the physical and sexual realm.Your marriage feels like you are spending 24/7 with your best friend. You like to confide in each other, but when the lights go out, you fall asleep rather than get it on. Being married to your bestie is great, but being passionate lovers is also the goal.No matter what your intimacy level is, there's always room to improve. With a little help, you can learn to flirt, communicate, and create the hot and steamy sex life married couples crave."The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in." — Morrie Schwartz3 tips for building and keeping a healthy intimate relationship...1) Don't be afraid to disagreeJust because you are intimate with someone, doesn't mean you have to agree on everything. Instead of bottling up your anger or suppressing your sexuality, it's always healthier to talk it out. On top of that, by sharing sexual experiences together, you're giving your marriage and your partner an outlet for adult play and discovery.2) Keep up with your own interestsEspecially when you have been together for a long time, it can be tempting to turn off that part of you and just be friends. But friends without benefits can end up putting an unhealthy amount of pressure on the relationship and be disappointing to one or both of you. Plus, infusing a more physical dynamic to your repetoir will add versatility and fun to your time together.3) Practice Open CommunicationInstead of counting on your significant other's mind-reading capabilities, try telling them directly what you want and need. While this might feel a bit awkward at first, practice makes perfect. On top of that, communicating your expectations will encourage your partner to do the same, especially when it comes to what you want in the bedroom.Want to be friends? Let me introduce myselfHey there, and welcome – I'm Monica Tanner 👋 I'm an expert marriage and intimacy coach based in Boise, Idaho. I'm here to help you and your spouse increase intimacy and connection in your marriage, ditch resentment and get busy writing your happily ever after love story.Studies show that half of all marriages end in divorce and of those couples who stay together, few are actually happy together. On top of that, couples who are unhappy typically wait 6 years before seeking help. That's crazy!!I've made it my goal to create resources to find better ways to communicate and enjoy inimacy, ultimately resulting in an intimate friendship that makes life better then you could even imagine. If you are ready to really start living that fairy tale, keep reading.Looking for a little extra guidance? Check out these 3 FREE resources1) Listen to this episode of my Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast. I share a simple, game-changing hack that will instantly increase intimacy and connection in your marriage. I'll teach you how to override your brain's default thoughts at 3 critical times during the day in order to feel more love and appreciation for your spouse, your family and your home.2) Follow me on Instagram. I post my tips for building healthy, happy relationships. Want more connection, communication, and intimacy? I've got you covered 🙌3)Book a FREE 30-minute consultation with me. If you can't wait another day to start transforming your relationship, book a time for us to chat! You've got nothing to lose, my friend.P.S. Expect to see me in your inbox ASAP with more tips for increasing connection, communication and intimacy!
4.
Your intimacy level is... Level 4 - Cold and Disconnected
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Congrats, friend – by completing the "What's your intimacy level?" quiz, you've shown your commitment to building a healthy, happy and intimate relationship 🙌Based on your responses, your intimacy level is a 4. So what does that actually mean? You long for intimacy and connection, but it eludes you. You are still married, but you share very little in terms of emotional and physical intimacy. You may struggle to trust your partner and seek constant confirmation of their love. Your partner is distant and probably sees you as needy or emotionally unstable.No matter what your intimacy level, there is always hope for improvement. With a little help, you can learn to listen, communicate, and create your best connection yet. It is possible to be married to your best friend and passionate lover."The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in." — Morrie Schwartz3 tips for building and keeping a healthy and intimate relationship...1) Don't be afraid to disagreeJust because you are intimate with someone, doesn't mean you have to agree on everything. Instead of bottling up your anger, it's always healthier to talk it out. On top of that, by expressing your emotions, you are building trust and closeness that is required for an intimate friendship.2) Keep up with your own interestsEspecially when you have been married for a long time, it can be tempting to take up your partner's interests and, in the process, lose your own. This might end up putting an unhealthy amount of pressure on the relationship. Plus, keeping up with your own interests and friend groups will enrich and add versatility to your time together.3) Practice Open CommunicationInstead of counting on your significant other's mind-reading capabilities, try telling them directly what you want and need. While this might feel a bit awkward at first, practice makes perfect. On top of that, communicating your expectations will encourage your partner to do the same.Want to be friends? Let me introduce myselfHey there, and welcome – I'm Monica Tanner 👋 I'm an expert marriage and intimacy coach based in Boise, Idaho. I'm here to help you and your spouse increase intimacy and connection in your marriage, ditch resentment and get busy writing your happily ever after love story.Studies show that half of all marriages end in divorce and of those couples who stay together, few are actually happy together. On top of that, couples who are unhappy typically wait 6 years before seeking help. That's crazy!!I've made it my goal to create resources to find better ways to communicate and enjoy inimacy, ultimately resulting in an intimate friendship that makes life better then you could even imagine. If you are ready to really start living that fairy tale, keep reading.Looking for a little extra guidance? Check out these 3 FREE resources1) Listen to this episode of my Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast. I share a simple, game-changing hack that will instantly increase intimacy and connection in your marriage. I'll teach you how to override your brain's default thoughts at 3 critical times during the day in order to feel more love and appreciation for your spouse, your family and your home.2) Follow me on Instagram. I post my tips for building healthy, happy relationships. Want more connection, communication, and intimacy? I've got you covered 🙌3)Book a FREE 30-minute consultation with me. If you can't wait another day to start transforming your relationship, book a time for us to chat! You've got nothing to lose, my friend.P.S. Expect to see me in your inbox ASAP with more tips for increasing connection, communication and intimacy!

There are 4 levels of intimacy. What is the level of intimacy in your marriage?

More marriages end in divorce than ever before. Does your relationship have what it takes to go the distance and if so, will be the happily ever after you've always dreamed of? Take this 3 minute quiz to find out.

Quiz Questions

Quiz Outcomes