How Comfortable are you at Communicating Boundaries?

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Quiz Questions

1.
Which of the following statements rings most true for you?
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- A.
  You have difficulty saying "NO" to family members, friends or colleagues and end up saying "YES" due to guilt, fear of disappointing others and obligation.
- B.
  You handily multitask and take on more than your fair share of the workload at home and work. Others wonder how you can manage all that you take on.
- C.
  You are comfortable speaking your truth and voicing your own needs. You may at times pretend to agree to avoid any confrontation and to keep the peace.
- D.
  You tend to put the needs of others above your own self-care, and physical and emotional wellness.
2.
Which of the following phrases best describes your unique approach to setting boundaries?
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- A.
  I set clear boundaries and enforce them consistently and confidently.
- B.
  I try to please everyone and avoid conflict at all costs.
- C.
  I allow whatever treatment I receive and rarely set boundaries. I’m unsure what a boundary is and think I can fix or rescue anyone from destructive behavior.
- D.
  I have fear around setting boundaries and often feel overwhelmed and overcommitted.
3.
How do you usually respond when someone (friend, family member, client, or colleague) asks you for a favor you don't want to do?
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- A.
  "Sure, no problem!" But, I feel internal pressure to do it all and often feel overwhelmed and stressed out.
- B.
  "I am sorry, but I am completely booked and cannot help you with that. "
- C.
  I feel guilty saying "NO," so I usually say "YES" even if I don't want to because I don't want to disappoint anyone.
- D.
  For me, it’s an automatic YES, no matter how big the ask. I get roped in time after time and feel responsible for taking care of the needs of others.
4.
Which of the following statements are true for you when taking time for self-care?
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- A.
  I tend to overextend in my commitments, putting everyone else's needs ahead of my own, and have little time for self-care.
- B.
  I prioritize self-care and communicate my needs clearly to my friends and family.
- C.
  I have difficulty being consistent with a self-care plan since I’m overbooked with commitments.
- D.
  Self-care? What’s that? I’m too busy taking care of everyone else; there is no me time, and I often wonder why I’m fighting fatigue.
5.
Which strategies do you use when someone violates your boundaries?
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- A.
  You re-affirm what your boundary is. Remind them of the action you said you would take and follow through.
- B.
  You let it slide and say nothing to avoid confrontation. You’d rather keep the peace.
- C.
  You cave into the boundary breach and decide the offending party didn’t mean it. They deserve yet another chance.
- D.
  You barely notice and may voice your objections but are already on to your next task. There are things to do and accomplish, so you keep going.
6.
How do you balance taking care of your own needs/practicing consistent self-care while also being there for your family and loved ones?
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- A.
  I work hard and go to a monthly massage for stress relief; it allows me to keep up with my hectic work, home, and community life. I book it on my calendar.
- B.
  I prioritize and schedule my self-care activities and set clear boundaries. I delegate responsibilities within the family and ask for support when I need it.
- C.
  I tend to put others' needs first and sometimes neglect my own self-care.
- D.
  It's challenging for me to find a healthy balance between meeting my needs, my family’s needs, and my work-life demands.
7.
What boundary pattern best describes you?
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- A.
  People Pleaser – You want everyone to like you and for them to be happy!
- B.
  Caretaker/Rescuer - You save friends/family members, sometimes to the point of enabling.
- C.
  Superwoman – You are a doer! You are trying to be everything for everyone, so you feel overcommitted, overwhelmed, and stressed to the max.
- D.
  Balance/Boundary Queen – You are fearless when setting boundaries. You voice your limits unapologetically and with confidence.
8.
You dread spending the holidays with your family because certain people tend to trigger you and often demonstrate inappropriate behavior. Would you:
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- A.
  Go and cater to the needs of the difficult people as you feel you can meet them where they’re at, and given time, you can fix their toxic behavior.
- B.
  Attend the gathering but walk on eggshells around the others to keep the peace.
- C.
  Go confidently and set clear boundaries by not engaging in conversations that are emotionally charged or touchy subjects.
- D.
  Say you’ll only be able to attend for a limited period due to other commitments. That will be accepted as they know you are always in hustle mode.
9.
When dealing with a toxic person, what do you do? What, if any, boundaries do you set?
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- A.
  No boundaries; keep giving in to their demands and continue to allow their unacceptable behavior.
- B.
  Ask them what’s wrong; as you can see, they are struggling somehow. And try your best to care for them or fix them.
- C.
  Be firm and assertive, and communicate your boundaries clearly.
- D.
  Tell them you don’t have time for nonsense. Do your best to set a boundary and keep on keepin’ on.
10.
A family member or friend with a drug or alcohol problem comes to you and asks to borrow $1,000. How do you respond?
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- A.
  “Sorry, not able to help you out this time. You still owe me $800.00”
- B.
  “Of course I will! Pass me my purse, and I’ll write a check."
- C.
  “Is that all you need? I can give you more if you want. I don’t want you to struggle.”
- D.
  "I am unable to continue supporting financially. I am happy to help you find a treatment center or counselor so that you can get on the road to recovery."

Quiz Outcomes

1.
The People Pleaser
2.
The Superwoman
3.
The Care Taker/Rescuer
4.
The Boundary Queen!

How Comfortable are you at Communicating Boundaries?

Take this short, fun, and informative quiz to learn about how comfortable you are when communicating your boundaries, and whether you can say "no" to people when it's what you really want!

Quiz Questions

Quiz Outcomes