What’s really driving your patterns?

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Quiz Questions

1.
1. When I feel “off,” it usually shows up like this:
- A.
  I’m buzzing — restless, anxious, on edge.
- B.
  I feel like I’m underwater — slow, a bit heavy, and not super motivated.
- C.
  My mind is spinning but my body’s frozen — like I want to do something, but can’t.
- D.
  I have off days, sure – but I can usually get back to myself pretty quickly.
2.
2. Most of the time, my energy feels like:
- A.
  Slow and low. I need a push to get moving.
- B.
  A mix that I can usually manage — I adjust based on what I need.
- C.
  Go-go-go. I’m doing all the things, all the time.
- D.
  Both! I feel wired and tired at the same time — like my body and brain are in a tug-of-war.
3.
3. When I try to slow down and rest:
- A.
  I can usually read what I need and give it to myself — rest or action, no big deal.
- B.
  I want to rest and do things — but I can’t seem to do either.
- C.
  It’s easy to rest… maybe a little too easy. Getting going again is the hard part.
- D.
  I get antsy. Doing nothing makes me feel unproductive or behind.
4.
4. When something stressful happens:
- A.
  I feel the stress, but I can usually stay present and figure out what I need.
- B.
  I panic a bit, but then jump into action and try to fix it.
- C.
  Inside, I’m spiraling. Outside, I look chill. It’s confusing.
- D.
  I shut down — I try to stay calm, but I kind of dissociate from it all.
5.
5. My relationship with control looks like:
- A.
  Part of me wants control, part of me wants to shut down and disappear.
- B.
  I’m usually the one in charge. If I don’t handle it, who will?
- C.
  I take control when it makes sense — and let go when it doesn’t.
- D.
  I’d rather let someone else take the lead — it feels safer that way.
6.
6. When it comes to my emotions, I tend to...
- A.
  Feel a LOT — sometimes too much. I get overwhelmed and swept away by big feelings.
- B.
  Tune in and feel what I feel. It’s not always easy, but I can usually work through it or ask for help when I need it.
- C.
  Bounce between both — I’ll be flooded one minute, numb the next.
- D.
  Feel...not much? I’m kind of disconnected and it’s hard to even name what’s going on inside.
7.
7. In relationships, I often find myself feeling...
- A.
  A little anxious and on edge — I’m always trying to make sure everything’s okay and my partner isn’t pulling away.
- B.
  Pretty shut down — like the part of me that wants connection just...doesn’t show up.
- C.
  Torn — one part of me craves closeness, the other part panics when things get too intimate.
- D.
  Safe and seen (most of the time) — and when something’s off, I can name it and talk about it.
8.
8. When I try to communicate in relationships, it feels like...
- A.
  A process — but I usually get there. I can express myself and work through things with my partner.
- B.
  A rollercoaster — sometimes I’m desperate to be heard, other times I go silent or shut down.
- C.
  Pulling teeth — I struggle to even know what I feel, let alone say it out loud.
- D.
  I’m always trying to talk it out — I need reassurance, even if it doesn’t always help.
9.
9. When an argument starts, I usually...
- A.
  Need space. I can’t think straight unless I get some distance first.
- B.
  Pause, check in with myself and my partner, and figure out what we need — even if that means taking a breather.
- C.
  Want to fix it right now — It’s hard for me to relax unless things feel resolved.
- D.
  Get stuck — one part of me wants to hash it out, another part wants to run for the hills.
10.
10. When I feel hurt by someone I love, I tend to...
- A.
  Say I’m fine (even when I’m not) and try to move on.
- B.
  Flip between needing them to understand right now, and not saying anything at all.
- C.
  Feel it, take a moment, then bring it up when I’m calmer and it can actually be a productive conversation.
- D.
  React quickly or bottle it up — either way, I’m scared my feelings will be “too much.”
11.
11. When it comes to sharing my emotional needs with a partner, I usually...
- A.
  Either spill them all at once or keep them hidden — I’m constantly wondering if I’m “too much.”
- B.
  Share them clearly (most of the time). I might stumble, but I get there — and I can usually repair if things get messy.
- C.
  Don’t really know what they are...so I kind of just keep it to myself.
- D.
  Swing between blurting them out in a big way and shutting down completely — it depends on the day (or hour).
12.
12. The thing that keeps me feeling stuck in relationships is...
- A.
  I’m constantly ping-ponging between craving closeness and needing to disappear. Neither one feels totally safe.
- B.
  I give more than I get. I want to bring it up, but I don’t want to rock the boat or seem needy.
- C.
  I need a lot of space — and when I ask for it, people take it personally.
- D.
  Nothing major — when we hit bumps, I can usually talk it out and figure out what’s going on.
13.
13. When I get triggered by something or someone, it feels like...
- A.
  I lose perspective — a younger, almost frantic version of me takes over and needs answers right now.
- B.
  I go quiet inside — like a fog rolls in and I just kind of disappear emotionally.
- C.
  Both! Sometimes I’m anxious and all over the place, other times I shut down hard — and I never really know what version I’m going to get.
- D.
  I might wobble, but I’m usually able to stay grounded or bring myself back when I’m ready.
14.
14. How often do I feel like a younger version or “child part” of me is running the show?
- A.
  Rarely — even when I’m triggered, I can feel my feelings without letting them take the wheel.
- B.
  A lot — it’s like there’s an inner tug-of-war between the part that wants to act and the part that wants to hide.
- C.
  Occasionally — it’s more of a numb, checked-out version of me, and I just kind of go offline.
- D.
  Now and then — when it happens, I feel anxious and reactive, like I have to fix it or I’ll fall apart.
15.
15. When it comes to my boundaries in close relationships, I’d say they’re...
- A.
  All over the place — sometimes I people-please, sometimes I shut everyone out.
- B.
  Steady, but flexible — I tune in to what I need and adjust when I have to.
- C.
  Too soft — I say “yes” too often and ignore how I actually feel.
- D.
  Pretty rigid — I’m quick to say “no” and often keep people at arm’s length.
16.
16. My biggest struggle with boundaries is...
- A.
  I don’t always know what my boundaries are — I feel torn and unsure.
- B.
  I don’t let people in — I say no too fast and miss out on connection.
- C.
  I override myself to keep others comfortable — and end up exhausted and resentful.
- D.
  Boundaries come pretty naturally to me — I can course-correct if I need to.
17.
17. What makes it hard to express my boundaries is...
- A.
  The unpredictability — sometimes I want connection and say “yes” to things that aren’t right for me, other times I push people away without even meaning to.
- B.
  The fear of being judged, rejected, or abandoned if I speak up.
- C.
  Not much — I can usually share my boundaries in a way that feels honest and kind.
- D.
  I do express them, but it’s more of a shutdown — like “nope, don’t care.”
18.
18. A story I often hear in my head is something like...
- A.
  “I’m not enough.” Even though I look like I’ve got it all together.
- B.
  “I don’t deserve good things.” When something good happens, it’s hard to let it in.
- C.
  “There’s something wrong with me” — plus a side of “I’m a bad person”.
- D.
  I have moments of self-doubt, sure — but I know how to talk myself through it.
19.
19. If I had to sum up my mental state most days, I’d say it feels like...
- A.
  “I can handle this.” Even when life gets tough, I trust myself to get through it.
- B.
  “I want to...but I can’t.” I’m pulled in two directions and it’s exhausting.
- C.
  “Why bother?” Things feel heavy, and motivation is hard to come by.
- D.
  “I have to do something!” Everything feels kind of urgent, like I can’t rest.
20.
20. When I reflect on my childhood, I…
- A.
  See a mix of chaos and unpredictability — I never knew what version of people I’d get, so I learned to adapt, fast.
- B.
  Can acknowledge the hard parts, but also feel like I was mostly supported, seen, and emotionally safe.
- C.
  Remember feeling like I had to keep it all together and stay ahead of the game - be a 'good' girl and make sure no one gets upset.
- D.
  Feel like I faded into the background — I didn’t want to rock the boat or be a burden.
21.
21. What I want most is…
- A.
  To keep deepening my self-trust, relationships, and sense of ease — I’m doing well, but growth still matters to me.
- B.
  To feel alive and connected again — like I can take up space and trust my voice.
- C.
  To feel settled inside — not constantly pulled in different directions by fear, urgency, or confusion.
- D.
  To finally count myself in and consider what I need without guilt — and stop measuring my worth by how others perceive me or how ‘productive’ I am.

Quiz Outcomes

1.
MOBILIZER
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You’re a Mobilizer.You learned to survive by staying busy, doing more, and holding it all together. You push through, fix things fast, and take responsibility for everyone and everything.But here’s the truth:Doing more won’t bring the peace you’re craving.It’s time to stop running on fumes—and start choosing you.There’s more waiting in your inbox (check your spam so you don't miss it!)We’ll unpack your patterns and explore what rewiring can look like—so go check your email now.
2.
DEACTIVATOR
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You’re an Immobilizer.You’ve learned to stay quiet, shut down, and carry it all alone. When things feel too big, you retreat—because at some point, it didn’t feel safe to be seen.But here’s the truth:Hiding won’t keep you safe forever.You’re allowed to take up space—and it’s time you did.There’s more waiting in your inbox (check your spam so you don't miss it!)We’ll go deeper into your patterns and what healing can look like—so check your email when you’re ready.
3.
COMBINATION
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You’re a Mobilizer/Immobilizer.You swing between doing it all and shutting it all down. One day you’re fixing everything—next day, you can’t get out of bed. That back-and-forth? It’s not failure. It’s survival.But here’s the truth:You’re not broken. You’re adapting.And there’s a steadier way forward.Your full results are in your inbox (check your spam so you don't miss it!)We’ll explore what it means to find safety in the middle—so go check your email when you’re ready.
4.
STEADY
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You’re Steady & Secure.You’ve done the work. You’ve built inner steadiness. You ride emotional waves without drowning—and that’s powerful.But here’s the thing:Even grounded people need support. You don’t have to hold it all alone.Your full results are in your inbox (check your spam so you don't miss it!)Let’s explore what deeper support can look like for you. Go check your email when you’re ready.