You've Done Everything Right. So Why Does It Still Feel So Heavy?
Created for women in medicine who are tired of carrying so much and want to understand why it’s so hard to put any of it down.
Quiz Questions
1.
When things start to feel like too much, what do you find yourself doing almost automatically?
A.
Looking around for who needs help and what I can do to make things better.
B.
Paying closer attention to what everyone needs from me and how they are responding.
C.
Checking more carefully so I don't miss something or get something wrong.
D.
Going over everything in my head, trying to figure out the right answer.
E.
Trying to get ahead of things so nothing unexpected catches me off guard.
2.
What do you notice before other people do?
A.
When someone is struggling and there may be something I can do to help.
B.
A shift in someone's mood or tone, even when they haven't said anything.
C.
A detail that could be better or something others may have missed.
D.
A question, possibility, or angle that hasn't been fully considered.
E.
Where something could go off track and what might keep it on course.
3.
Which of these is hardest for you to let happen without doing something about it?
A.
Watching someone struggle with something I know I could help solve.
B.
Knowing someone is disappointed, unhappy, or frustrated with me.
C.
Letting something be finished when I know it could have been done better.
D.
Making an important decision without knowing for certain that it is the right one.
E.
Watching things unfold without stepping in to organize, direct, or course-correct.
4.
When what you need conflicts with what feels necessary in the moment, what usually happens?
A.
Someone else usually needs something more, so I put myself aside and take care of them first.
B.
I adjust, accommodate, or say yes because disappointing someone feels worse than disappointing myself.
C.
I push through because lowering the standard doesn't really feel like an option.
D.
I question what I need or want until I'm no longer sure I can trust it.
E.
I set aside what I need until I’ve done what I can to make sure things go the way I think they should.
5.
Which of these sounds most like an unspoken rule you live by when you're under pressure?
A.
If I can fix it, I should.
B.
If someone is unhappy with me, I need to make it right.
C.
If I can do it better, I should.
D.
If I think about it long enough, I can figure out the right answer.
E.
If I stay on top of everything, I can keep things from falling apart.
6.
When you've been under pressure for too long, what do you notice yourself losing touch with?
A.
My own limits, because helping can start to feel more important than noticing when I’ve taken on too much.
B.
What I actually want, because I’m so focused on other people’s expectations and reactions.
C.
The ability to feel satisfied with what I've done instead of immediately seeing what could be better.
D.
My own knowing, because the more I think, the harder it becomes to trust what I already know.
E.
The ability to relax and let things unfold without feeling like I need to manage them.
7.
Which of these would feel most like relief, even if nothing about your workload changed?
A.
Being able to care about someone without feeling responsible for solving what they're going through.
B.
Being able to let someone be disappointed without immediately questioning myself.
C.
Being able to decide that something is good enough and genuinely let it be done.
D.
Being able to make a decision and trust myself without continuing to revisit it.
E.
Being able to let some things remain uncertain without feeling compelled to get them under control.
Quiz Outcomes
1.
Fixer
2.
People-Pleaser
You feel most safe when everyone around you is happy and satisfied. Your go-to strategy to deal with overwhelm and fear is to focus on others.
3.
Perfectionist
4.
Overthinker
5.
Controller